Two Sides Of The Moon
by Phoenix Hoshika
Summary: Yue muses over his relationships with those around him. Please be sure to read very important author's note at the beginning, thank you.
1. Chapter One

**++++READ FIRST++++**

**A/N:**** I do not advocate shounen-ai or the like and this little bit is only here to establish something. So if you feel you should not look at this any further be my guest. I don't want anything I write affecting people negatively. **

**NOTE**: So that I don't get anyone confused Touya, and Yuki are 16; Sakura, Tomoyo, Eriol, Mei Lin and Shyaoran are 14. Just thought that with all the drama going on leaving Sakura and friends at the age of ten would cause them to have premature deaths and I need them around for further fics. xoxo Phoenix Hoshika

**Disclaimer:** I am obviously not CLAMP and therefore do not own Cardcaptor Sakura. There is no profit except the joy of being a fan being made from this writing.

**The Two Sides of the Moon**

By: Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter One

It was a year ago that I became aware that I was not at all what I thought I was. It was a year ago that memories of my true identity came flooding in like a tidal wave. At first I thought that I was separate from the quiet persona that everyone knew as Yukito. After only a few days I knew that we were the same and that what came out in me as Yukito was there all along, but not something that I would allow myself to reveal to anyone willingly. Yue does not indulge in social activities such as sports; and Yue certainly does not become confused. Yet, just a week ago I did become somewhat confused.

In my false form as Yukito, Touya and I had skipped school. At first I refused such an idea, but Touya said since we were both good students it wouldn't matter if we skipped just once. Curious as to what he had planned for us I agreed to cut class that once. That day we left early with the excuse that we were going to soccer practice, but of course there was no soccer practice that day and as soon as we got near the park we dodged off into the bushes quickly changing out of our uniforms and into more causal clothes. Touya laughed at me the whole time telling me to relax, but I had never did anything so deceitful in my entire life, not even as Yue. Changing closes in the shrubbery of the park only made my feelings of guilt deepen.

"Now what," I asked tying my shoelace. Touya looked at me then off to the side and shrugged.

"I don't know."

"Touya." I said a little irritated.

"My father and Sakura should be clear of the house by 8:30 we can go back there have something to eat then figure out what to do from there."

"Are you sure we won't get caught?"

"You are just as uptight as Yue. Relax." Touya sometimes made comments like that to remind me that he knew there really was no difference between my false form and me. Despite the fact that his little comments irritated me sometimes I just smiled.

Later at his house we went into his room and closed the door. For two hours we played video games, which I thoroughly whooped him in even though I didn't really play that often. Touya seemed annoyed by this which he expressed through glaring at me from time to time, but smiled after our last game announcing he was bored. I turned off the game system and the TV. Touya sat on his bed and I leaned against the wall by the window.

"I'd be bored too if I couldn't win a single game." I said teasingly. All Touya had to say to this was;

"Shutup." This amused me so I smiled leaning my head back to rest on the wall. Touya still sat on his bed except this time his head was lowered and he gave a sigh.

"Now what?" He asked looking at the floor.

"Touya, are you asking me?" I said nearly laughing. "This was all your idea you should plan things out next time." I closed my eyes still smiling. The sunlight that peeked in through the closed shades felt good, though not has well as the light from a full moon. I could hear Touya chuckling at my remark then silence. This was a bad idea. Listening to Fujiyama Sensei drone on about ancient Japan would be more interesting than this. Why did Touya bring me back to his home instead of going some place more interesting like one of the shopping districts? There is always something interesting going on in those areas. Then a disturbing thought crossed my mind and when I opened my eyes Touya was standing in front of me with a serious expression.

"What?" I asked slightly surprised at his sudden change in mood.

"You know I care about you a lot…" He said slowly as he moved closer. Suddenly it became clear why he brought me here and where this conversation was going. I always thought the first and only person I would ever kiss would be someone else… My heart had jumped into my throat despite my calm appearance. Disregarding the feeling of apprehension I just nodded. Touya is the only friend I ever had and as such was very dear to me, so no matter what I swore that I would be there for him. Then when he saved my life I felt an even stronger obligation. I assumed the obligation I felt toward him is love and so I believed it made the situation alright…

"You've always been there for me. When the first woman I loved left me you were right there to help me through that hard time. It seemed like you were the answer to the void I felt inside and I started to think it didn't matter, that perhaps our relationship could change and when you said you felt the same it seemed like the perfect solution…" Touya continued putting his hand on my shoulder. "…but now I know it was wrong to try to twist our friendship into something it was never meant to be. I'm sorry."

I let out a heavy sigh of relief.

"Are you ok?" Touya asked stepping back a pace.

"I'm fine." I said sliding down to the floor and putting my head between my legs.

"You're not acting fine are you upset?"

"No." There was complete silence for a moment. I could feel Touya's eyes peering down at me.

"…Oh! I see. You were thinking that… Yare yare, what kind of guy do you think I am?

I couldn't take being in human form much longer; my face was so hot it felt like it would burn up. Standing I changed into my true form.

"Forgive?" I asked still too embarrassed to speak correctly.

"Yue, I gave you my power because I wanted to help you and because I knew you would protect Sakura. I only made you promise to do just that so you would understand why I did it. I don't want you feeling like you owe me something. I rather have you as a friend than a slave, for my sake as well as Sakura's." Touya sat down on the bed with a troubled expression on his face. A few minutes past before I said anything.

"I am not angry with you." I forced myself to say. Though I felt a bit of relief from his words I also felt pain and anger. How was I supposed to put meaning to the feelings I had for him other than those of a loyal slave? I didn't want to believe that all I felt toward him was nothing more than a deep obligation. Even though I was created by a human I could never bring myself to believe I was below them in any way, but was that all me and my brother were, more than animals, but still less than humans? Would I ever feel more than the obligation of servitude toward the people I called friends, especially my mistress Sakura, who called me her friend even though I fought against her authority?

As I thought about her I suddenly felt a peace and warmth inside that I had always, up until that point, suppressed and ignored. What was this I was feeling? Then I heard her voice in my mind "I love you!". She had said this to me while I was Yukito, but I would not return her feelings. It was at that moment I finally fully realized how terrible I treated her and truly started to feel like scum. I even tried to convince Sakura out of her love for my false form Yukito, buy saying she was confused, that the romantic feelings she had for Yukito were actually akin to the love she felt for her father. No, the truth was I was the confused one.

"Oi, Yue. Are you asleep? Pull yourself together so we can hit the theme park across town."

"Let's go." I said after returning to my borrowed form.

"I told Sakura I would walk her home today so we can't be late to meet my sister at the park. She might get suspicious and I don't want my father to find out that I skipped school."

"Okay." I said giving him one of my best smiles.

**2:59 p.m. **

Touya and I had arrived at the park about ten minutes early. I watched the children play on the penguin slide while Touya watched the street like a hawk for Sakura. _"There he goes with that sister complex of his again."_ I thought laughing inside. I wonder if he will ever get over it?

"Oniichan!" I heard Sakura call out as she approached. I turned around to greet her with a smile and;

"Konnichiwa, Sakurachan."

"Konnichiwa, Yukitosan."

"Konnichiwa, Kinomotosan, Tsukishirosan." Tomoyo said as she caught up to Sakura.

Touya just grunted.

"Konnichiwa, Tomoyochan." I said in an effort to dismiss Touya's rude greeting.

"Yuki, you want to come over our house for dinner?" Sakura invited cheerful as ever.

Touya put his hand on my shoulder and shook his head. "That will be no good."

"Why?" I asked feeling like it was going to lead to something bad.

"The monster is cooking dinner tonight. I don't think you should come unless you wanna be poisoned."

Sakura turned red. "I am not a monster and I know how to cook!" Sakura kicked Touya in the shin of his left leg, who then wrenched in pain. I pretended not to see anything as usual and just smiled. It wasn't like he didn't have it coming. Sakura is cute, why must he always tease her so harshly? Sakura was flustered as she tried to regain control of herself before she spoke again.

"For dessert I'm making strawberry shortcake."

"I am sure it will be good." I said.

"Sakurachan makes the best strawberry shortcakes." Tomoyo blushes as she adds; "Sakurachan is very good at everything." As soon has she finished speaking a black limo suddenly pulled up to the curb and a woman dressed in black wearing sunglasses stepped out the car and opened the back passenger door. Tomoyo's mother stepped out the car and wrapping her arms around her daughter.

"Tomoyochan, I got off work early and thought that we should spend some time together at the mall."

"Okay." Tomoyo said as she turned to say her goodbyes. "You don't mind do you Sakurachan?" Sakura cheerfully shook her head in response and Tomoyo stepped into the limo. As it pulled off I noticed that I was not the only one still staring at the large car as it drove away.

When we arrived at the Kinomoto residence Sakura rushed for the mail. A squeal escaped her lips as she ran into the kitchen where me and Touya were.

"Mei Lin and Shyaoran wrote me!"

As soon as she said his name Touya's expression turned dark. "Why does that brat keep sending letters to Sakura." He muttered to me. I just smiled. I don't particularly care for Shyaoran either, but what can I say? Apparently Sakura likes him and that's what matters right? Besides he is a good person, though a little uptight, but who am I to talk about someone else being uptight? I pride myself on being the King of uptight. Shyaoran has nothing on me, so as I stated before; who am I to call someone else uptight?

"I'm so glad to hear they are doing ok." Sakura continued as she finished reading the letters.

Touya nudges me in the ribs to get my attention. "Let's go into the living room and watch TV. The monster probably will take a while to make dinner."

"I heard that!" Sakura said looking rather peeved. I just shook my head. Touya really does have a funny way of showing Sakura that he loves her.

A little more than twenty minutes passed. Me and Touya were watching a show on TV called Dragon something and nothing worth mentioning had happened. I thought they were going to fight, but all they did was just stand around talking about fighting. It was a pointless show and I was getting irritated.

"I'm going to help Sakurasan." I said cheerily even though I was ready to kick a hole in the TV. Touya just grunted. I couldn't believe he was really watching that nonsense. Walking into the kitchen I could see Sakura standing over a pot stirring its contents.

"Can I help?"

"Hoee!" Sakura was surprised and almost fell over.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

"It's okay, and you don't have to help me."

"Don't worry about it, I want to." I said washing my hands. _"I really do. If you don't allow me to help prepare dinner I'll have to go back in there with Touya and watch Dragon dolts and if I have to stare at one more minute of that I am going to loose my mind."_ I thought keeping my calm composure.

"Really?" Thank you very much. Uh, just stir this for me." Sakura said indicating the pot she was standing over.

"I'll help too." Touya said walking into the kitchen. He went to immediately chop up some vegetables.

During dinner Sakura started to tell us about her day she seemed so happy and full of energy as she talked. I was sitting beside Touya eating slowly as not to make a pig of myself as I had done many times before.

"Monster, if you keep talking your food will get cold." As soon as Touya said that there was a look of pain on his face and Sakura was giving him a death stare. When she noticed I was looking at her she quickly regained her composure.

"So, Yukitosan, how did soccer practice go this morning?" Why did she have to ask that question? I panicked not knowing what to say. I could have said it went fine, but that would have been too easy. Instead I just started giggling like an idiot. Sakura was giving me one of those "what is that about?" looks.

"It went fine." Touya said gruffly.

"Time for shortcake." Sakura announced leaving the table. As soon as her back was turned Touya smacked me in the back of the head.

"Baka." Touya whispered.

"Hey." I said aggravated.

"You almost gave us away. Why are you being like this?"

I just sighed_. "Trying to carry two separate personae can be tiring. I guess my brain decided to skip out on me today. Get a grip."_ I thought berating myself mentally.

"Here." Sakura said handing me and Touya each a plate with a piece of cake on them. "How is it?" She asked as soon as we each took a bite.

"It tastes great." I said.

"Really?"

"Un," Touya grunted in agreement. The first nice thing he said to her all day I believe.

"I'm glad." Sakura said smiling sweetly.

As soon as I finished the cake I thanked Sakura for the meal and went home. The house was empty as usual. So I changed into my true form and walked to the window where the moon shined in brightly. It felt good to stand there in the moonlight. I closed my eyes and remembered Clow.

It was late at night and the moon was full. I was out in the garden staring up at it. The night was cool, but it didn't bother me. I heard the rustling of leaves behind me then Clow spoke up.

"There you are child. Wouldn't you like to rest now?"

I just shook my head.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" He said looking up at the sky and then yawned.

"You're tired, you should rest."

"I'm fine, Yue. My time with you and Keroberos is short so I rather spend it with you two children before I am gone." That's all he said. He stood there with me all night and when the sun came up he sat out in the cool weather with Keroberos chatting until the sun went down. I never talk much not even as Yukito. Quiet is just fine with me so I never joined their conversations. Clow was dear to me like a father, but I never told him that, even so I believe he may have known. Despite that hope I still regret that I didn't say anything. I remember when he told us he would be leaving soon and I vowed not to allow anyone else to become my master.

When it was time for the final judgment I was hard on them. Shyaoran Li was Clow's descendant, but that was not good enough. He wasn't even as powerful as Clow, so I got rid of him quickly. Then it was Sakura's turn to try to defeat me she wouldn't even fight. Not even when I tried to force her. I felt sympathy for her peaceful soul, but I had to keep my promise to Clow Reed. If she wanted to be my master she would have to defeat me. At her low power level I didn't think she would last so long, but she did. Even after I thought I had beaten her she was able to come back with the power to use the cards under my control to capture me. It was then that that I realized that I had no choice but to serve her and break my promise to Clow. Then she said something that no one had ever said to me before, something I was not expecting. She said she did not want to be my master and that she wanted to be my friend. She said she loved Keroberos and that she was sure that she already loved me too. I believed her and understood why Keroberos believed in her; it was because of her big heart.

Then I started thinking about how she felt for my false form, Yukito. And what I told her when she told me that she was in love with me. She must have been very sad when I rejected her, even more so because of the way I rejected her. How could I try to convince her into believing the nature of her love for me was not what she thought? It is a good thing that Shyaoran was there for her, but I could have been more honest with her and just have told her from the beginning that I thought I was in love with Touya. It took her asking for me to admit to that. Now that I know now the strong love I felt for Touya was not romantic I feel worse remembering that day. Why did it have to take a whole year for me to figure it out? I felt rotten, like a complete bastard for what I said to Sakura for making her sad and then not having the courage to ask her to forgive me. I feel even more regret now that Sakura has Shyaoran who writes to her everyday. She is happy. So why am I feeling this way? Is it because when I rejected her I also rejected how I felt toward her as well?

To be continued...


	2. Chapter Two

**Two Sides of the Moon**

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter Two

"Yatta!" Sakura yelled excitedly as she ran up the stairs. Touya and me could hear her stomping by as she ran into her room and slammed the door. The sudden outburst of noise startled us out of deep concentration as we were studying for our chemistry final in his room. I didn't even sense her approaching I was so deep in study.

"That monster, stomping around at a time like this…" Touya grumbled getting up.

"She sounds excited. I wonder what it could be?" I said standing as well and stretched.

"I'm just going to tell her to keep it down."

I sat back down. I could have tagged along to find out what all the excitement was about, but I don't want to be a party to Touya's teasing. "Go easy on her." I said smiling.

"I'll go any way I want with her."

_"There he goes again."_ I thought. _"Oh, well."_

When Touya came back he seemed more disgruntled than before.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"The 'brat' is coming here for the summer with his family."

"You mean…"

"His whole family." Touya repeated and we both cringed. Shyaoran's mother I could tolerate I would even go as far as to say I liked her, but his sisters are another story. At least we are not in their domain so this time we won't have to put up with all the touching and grabbing.

A week later our finals were over and summer vacation had started. Touya and I were mall trawling. He spent his time in the arcade and I spent mine at the food stands until it was time for dinner. Even though I didn't need to eat so much as Yukito since Touya gave me his power I still enjoyed it. Cookies, candy, soda, ocha, udon, miso, soba, sukiyaki, sushi if you could eat it I loved it. I just wished I could eat in my true form.

As we approached the Kinomoto residence we noticed a mini van in the driveway.

"Hmmm." Touya groaned as he narrowed his eyes.

"Were you expecting someone for dinner?" I asked.

"Maybe my father or Sakura, but they would have said something earlier."

"Then who is it?"

When we got in the door the answer was obvious. All five of Shyaoran's sisters were in the living room.

"Osashiburi da yo ne?" They said in unison as they came our way.

"I have a part time job I need to get to." Touya said coolly before he bolted like a rabbit out the door. That was my cue to leave too, but I was stunned to see them there and even more stunned at how fast Touya could run leaving me behind. Next thing I know there were hands and arms all over me.

"Kawaii!"

"Totemo kawaii!"

"Thank you, but please let me go." I said in a pathetic attempt to get them away from me.

"You're too cute to let go."

"Demo, demo, Yukitosan is seeing someone." Sakura said coming to my defense.

"Awe!" They said releasing me as they went into the kitchen.

"Arigatou, Sakurachan." I said gratefully. Then it hit me, she still thought Touya and me were… No one knew about it besides her, but still it bothered me. It bothers me even more that she didn't know that it was over. At least her ignorance was able to save me. I should've felt happy, not like I was hit by a ton of bricks.

"Sorry about that they followed me here." Shyaoran said before he too went into the kitchen.

"My dad is making dinner. Since they just dropped by I wasn't sure if we would have enough food for them, but they brought food with them and Shyaoran's mother is helping, so it is near done." Sakura informed as was about to head into the kitchen herself.

"Sakuranchan, before we eat dinner I have to tell you something," I said in a serious tone.

"What is it?"

"You see me and Touya broke up."

"I know," she said cheerfully. "I just told a fib for you so you owe me now."

"You knew…" I said feeling a little sick. What did I expect, for her to put her heart on her sleeve again for me?

"Un, Touya told me Sunday night after pulling a prank on me…" Her face suddenly went sour.

"Wanna snack before dinner?" Sakura asked holding up a gallon of ice-cream.

"Very much." I said with eyes watering.

A few days later I decided to stop by the restaurant Touya was working at for lunch.

"Good afternoon, my name is Kinomoto Touya and I will be your waiter. What would you like?" Touya asked me in a very unpleasant monotone voice.

"Touya you don't have to be so formal with me." I said teasingly.

"What would you like?" He said in the same tone with a hint of annoyance.

"Whatever the special is."

"Hai."

"When Touya came back with the food he still seemed very unhappy.

"You don't look so good."

"It's Sakura, she's been crying since yesterday. If we try to find out what's wrong she just says she is fine and pulls a smile. We know she doesn't want us to worry about her but…"

"Oh."

"Yuki, maybe if you could stop by once you've finished here she might tell you."

"In that case I can go now. I'll take this with me."

"Thank you."

"Don't mention it. I care about Sakura too."

When Sakura opened the door her face seemed a little red and slightly wet. She must have been crying.

"Yukitosan, what are you doing here?"

"I just decided to stop by. May I come in?"

"Hai, sorry about that." She said stepping aside and letting me in.

"Could you hold this for me?" I asked handing the bag of food to her so I could take off my shoes. "I bought this not too long ago so it should still be hot. There is enough here for the both of us." I smiled. Still she seemed sad. Food always made me happy while in my borrowed form. I assumed it would have made her happy too, but it didn't. "Is everything okay?" I final asked.

"It's… Never mind I'll go put the food on some plates so we can eat it."

Just when I thought she would say what was on her mind.

We sat in the kitchen and ate the meal in silence. It would have been nice if Sakura wasn't so upset.

"What's wrong?" I asked again in an even more concerned tone. Sakura started to cry.

"Shyaoran… Shyaoran… Shyaoran broke up with me. He said within the year he's been in Hong Kong he found himself still thinking of the Cards and the power I had because of them. He said it was because he thought about that more than me was the reason we shouldn't be together, because he would be after my power and not my heart but, I don't want to believe that. He is a good person so why would he say something like that?" By then I had gotten up to give her a hug. She was crying heavily and I could barely understand her through the sobbing.

"Why?" She asked again. "I thought we were really in love. I don't understand, why?"

Poor Sakura. She has had her heart broken twice in her short life. I wanted to tell her everything, but I forfeited that chance a year ago. Why was I so foolish? Why did I have to be so selfish? She was hurting and all I could think was_; "Good, maybe there is still an opportunity for me."_ Even if there were I needed to focus on cheering her up, and Touya, he would hurt that kid if he found out he was the reason Sakura was so upset all this time. All I could do then was tell her it will be alright and that I would be there for her if she needed anything.

To be continued…


	3. Chapter Three

**Two Sides of the Moon**

By Phoenix Hoshika

Chapter Three

It was ten o'clock that meant I woke up late that morning. Even though it was a Saturday and I had nothing in particular to do that day it felt so weird not getting up at least by seven. As Yukito I try to remain busy, perhaps to make up for all those years I spent not doing a thing while Clow was alive and then sleeping the centuries away after he died, maybe. Any excuse will do to avoid admitting the fact that I had developed a split personality. Yue, is the picture of togetherness and having a split personality is not being together. Oh how I hate thinking about troublesome things. Besides that there is only one troublesome thing in my life that is worth thinking about right now and it is not my mental state. How would I get Sakura's attention? But, before I started thinking on that I thought maybe I should get out of bed first.

I didn't change into my borrowed form as usual when I go to bed. I figured it wouldn't be a problem, but as I sat up I felt numbness mixed with pain. My right wing was asleep from laying on it all night and when the feeling came back I could tell there was a cramp in it. Now I remember why I prefer to sleep sitting up as unpleasant as it may seem it feels much better than waking up like this. If only I had just decided not to get up today I would be fine. Being asleep is much better, but I can't sleep. I have to think of a plan to win Sakura's heart. Wow! Look how confident Yue is thinking.

I can't be so presumptuous to think anything will do. This has to be well planned and sophisticatedly executed or I could mess it all up. Touya is my best friend and if it were anything else I would ask him for his advice, but because of that sister complex of his he might turn on me. No, Touya must never find out that I am in love with is younger sister. If Naruku were here maybe I could get her to keep Touya busy. That way he would be too worried about her pouncing on him to pay me any attention. But that would be too convenient. Perhaps if I get out of bed I would be able to think more sensibly, but on the other hand I could be thinking this way because I didn't get enough sleep. So, I will set my alarm clock for two more hours then I will get up.

It wasn't until I changed back into my borrowed form that I realized I was hungry. For someone who eats so much one would think I would have the kitchen stock piled with food. When I opened the refrigerator there wasn't a single thing inside, it was completely bare as if it had never been used. I sighed out loud before putting my shoes on to head out to the grocery store.

On the way home I ran into someone I didn't expect to see. Akizuki Naruku. She was glaring at me strangely. Naruku had given Yukito strange looks before which he just passed off with a smile. I tried to do so again this time with a pleasant konnichi wa, but before I could get the words out of my mouth she punched me in the stomach.

"Akizukisan, why?" I asked after falling to my knees clutching my aching stomach.

"Don't play dumb with me Yue." She said in a low voice. "Touya is mine and I wouldn't let you get in the way. Not this time.

"Nani? What are you talking about?" Her words stabbed at me like a mechanical knife. It makes me feel uneasy that she knows about what I thought was buried and forgotten.

"Bastard!" She yelled kicking me in the gut before I could stand up. "You are unbelievable, Yue."

"I don't understand." I say from my position on the ground being careful not to get up hoping she wouldn't hit me again as long as I stayed down.

"Listen Yue." Naruku starts as she stoops down and grabs me up by my collar. "You can play this innocent act all you want to but I know the only difference between your borrowed form and your true self is only a matter of appearance."

Is it that obvious? Is she going to laugh at me now for being a mental case? Yue doesn't like being mocked and if I could I would show her, but she is much stronger and faster than me and she already has me at a disadvantage. I remember my first match with Ruby Moon and it was not an easy one. I barely escaped her fury swipes. Right now attempting to put up a fight would insure an immeasurable amount of pain that I am not willing to take right now, so for now I will let her do what she will with me and just pray it doesn't hurt too much.

"Pay attention to me Sleepy Moon!" Naruku yells shaking me. "I can't believe you are what I have as a rival, how embarrassing." She says letting me go and standing up. When she was a good three meters away from me I stood to my feet only to be knocked to the ground a third time by the angry Naruku.

"You made me forget, I wasn't finished with you Yue." She said narrowing her eyes at me. I can't stand it when she looks at me like that or how she says my name. It's like she is trying to bate me into a fight she knows I can't win so all can do is smile at her. "Do you hear me Sleepy Moon? DON'T GET IN MY WAY." She emphasized before starting to walk away again.

"Hai, Akizukisan, but would I be in your way if I were to help you win Touya's heart?" I ask smiling still seated on the ground in case she decided to take another swipe at me.

"What?" She says swiftly turning around. Uh oh, I knew it. She's going to hit me again. This body bruises so easily I hope she doesn't.

"Are you mocking me?" Naruku asks, hands on her hips.

"Iie, I really want to help." I really do for reasons many reasons.

"Mmmm, I don't know if I can trust you." She says. It is obvious she is giving my offer some thought and giving me that look again. Then suddenly her mood changes and a smile creases her lips. "That makes me sooo happy!" She squeals dropping to the ground and wrapping her arms around me and kissing me on the cheek. Why is it that just then a group of girls walk by staring and giggling? Why is it that the streets were vacant while she was beating the crap out of me? I am sure if they weren't she would not have been so brutal with me.

"Yue, this makes me so happy!" Rudy squeals again.

"I know, now please get off of me."

"Ma, but you're so cute like this, just like a little bunny." She said letting go of me and standing up. I can't believe how fickle this girl is. Does she really love Touya? I took the liberty of standing up since she didn't seem to be a threat any more. Looking down at the ground I could see my precious food was scattered all over the place. At least it is still in the packages so I can still eat it. I started to pick the food up and place it back in the bags when I saw another set of hands reach down to help me pick up the food I had dropped. Looking up I realized those hands belonged to Naruku. I thought she had taken her leave of me. What is she plotting now?

"Yue, I really am glad. We are already rivals on the battlefield, it was just disturbing with both of us after Touya." Naruku's tone was sincere, but does she have to keep bringing that up? Grief!

"Ok, stopping mentioning that and don't ever bring it up again." I say trying to control myself.

"I can tell you are mad at me, Yue." What? So was that her goal, to piss me off? "I just want to say that I know what you have been going through and that I understand how confusing things can get."

I open my mouth to say something, but what can I say? I am totally dumbfounded at her sudden kindness toward me.

"You don't have to say anything Yue. I just want you to know that if you need somebody to talk that I will be there for you. Just because we are rivals it doesn't mean we can't be friends." Naruku hands me the last item of food and the evil look I am so accustomed to receiving from her returns to her face. "But know this Yue, if you ever deceive me I will never forgive you. After all what type of man would toy around with a woman's heart? Understand Yue? You even think about screwing me over I will crush you!"

Woah, that was a shock. All I do is smile. I would never hurt a friend. Yue is very loyal. In time I hope Ruby Moon will understand that I would never do anything to hurt her. As she walks away I begin to think that perhaps Akizuki is not as fickle as I had first thought.


	4. Chapter Four

Two Sides of the Moon

By phoenix Hoshika

Chapter 4

After eating I decided to go visit Touya, even though I knew he wouldn't be home. Again he had another part time job to go to. As I came up to the gate I could here voices. One of them I am sure belonged to Sakura.

"I think I'll have an after school party on Friday to celebrate." Sakura said cheerfully.

"To celebrate what, Sakurachan?"

"My new roller-blade record of course."

"What is it this time?"

"The same as last time." Sakura sighs. "I've just been so down lately, I was thinking throwing a small party might cheer me up. Of course only VIPs are invited: you, Kerochan, and since Eriol is town him too." Sakura continued the cheerful tone returning to her voice.

"I'm glad I made your list."

"You always make my list Tomoyochan." Sakura said giggling.

I love to hear her laugh. The only thing that is bothering me is that she didn't even mention my name. Ha, and Kerobaros thinks she favors me. I wish. Maybe coming here was a mistake.

"Konnichi wa, Tsukishirosan."

"Konnichi wa Yukitosan."

"Sakurachan!" I can't believe I was so far off in lala land that Sakura was able to sneak up on me like that. Get it together Yue, Sakura would never fall for a dingbat.

"Sorry we surprised you, Tsukishirosan." Tomoyo said humbly.

"Are you here to see my big brother?" Sakura asked with a quizzical look on her face.

"Sort of…" Why did I say that? "I'm sorry but he went to work today…"

"Oh." I said looking at the ground. She's not even trying to make conversation with me. Maybe it's because she was on her way to do something important or maybe it's because I am not worth her time. I'm making myself depressed."

"How about inviting Tsukishirosan to your party Sakurachan?" Tomoyo says and did she just wink at me? No, I must be seeing things.

"Right." Sakura says before turning to me. "Would you like to come over after school this Friday?"

Hmm, do I have anything to do this Friday? Iiya. What am I thinking? "Thanks for inviting me over Sakurachan. What's the occasion?" As if I don't already know.

"Sakurachan just wants to spend time with her closest friends." Tomoyo chimes in before Sakura can say a word.

"Is that so?" I ask taking step closer to Sakura.

"Hai, hai."

"Ah, in that case I am honored to be considered a close friend." I say feeling giddy.

"Ah! I forgot to put on my blades." Sakura exclaims. We all stare down at her bare feet causing her to turn red. "I'll be right back." she says before rushing off.

"Tsukishirosan…"

"Hm?"

"I-." Tomoyo doesn't get to finish what she was going to say because Sakura returns just as fast as she left.

"Ready to go!" She announces coming to a screeching halt on the side walk next to Tomoyo who sighs.

"Ja ne." I say waving as Sakura pulls Tomoyo away waving as well.

I wonder what Tomoyo was trying to say. It seemed really important by the look on her face.

On Friday I stopped by a bakery and picked up some cream puffs before going to see Sakura. When I arrived Touya answered the door.

"What are you doing here?" He asked in a low voice only cracking the door.

"Why are you behaving so strangely?" Hoping to make him forget his question. If I have to answer him I just might lie.

Touya sticks his head out the door quickly looking around then yanks me inside.

"Touya ?" I say bewildered.

"Naruku." He says bending over to put on his shoes.

"Huh?"

"Akizuki Naruku, she's been following me all day." He says standing up. "Sorry I can't hang with you now I have a part time job to go to," Touya states before rushing out the door.

As soon as he got out the gate I heard him scream.

"Touyakun!" Naruku shrieks before jumping on his back.

"Get off me Naruku I'm going to be late."

"Ma, you have a part time job to go to? That means we won't get to spend any time together." Naruku whines climbing off of him.

"What makes you think I was going to spend any time with you?" Touya snaps.

"Because we are destined to be together." Naruku responds happily.

"What!"

"You called me Naruku this time instead of by my last name. That means your growing to love me more each day."

"Grief, your incorrigible."

"Let me walk with you!"

"No way!" Touya says running away.

"Touyakun, matte!" Naruku yells running after him.

I just stand there laughing to myself. Naruku might never win Touya if she keeps going after him like that. I should probably tell her to tone it down and find out if it's only her strong come ons that chase Touya away.

"Yue."

Upon hearing my name I close the door as I return to my true form involuntarily. I immediately know it was Kerobaros who called out my name, because no one can cause me to transform by speaking my name except him. This ticks me off. So I just huff at him.

"Still with the nasty attitude are we?"

"Hmph, what do you want?" I say picking the train of my garment off the floor.

"I haven't seen you in a long time and…"

This better be good Kerobaros. "And what?"

"I sense that you have an agenda for being here. What's going on?"

Since when do I report to you Kerobaros? "None of your business."

"Excuse me." Kerobaros says dejectedly.

"Yuesan!" Sakura says with surprise nearly dropping the tray of cookies she is holding.

"Ah, Yuesan is here. I guess Tsukishirosan won't be making it tonight." Tomoyo says holding a teapot. This time I am certain she winked at me. What's going on with that girl?

Hearing the doorbell rang Sakura hands the tray to the stuffed animal looking sun guardian and we both hide in the kitchen.

"Konnichi wa." I hear a male voice say. Peaking out of the kitchen door I see that it is Eriol. "This is for you." He says handing her a rose.

"A-arigato." Sakura says accepting the small present. I can see her blushing from here. I think I'm going to kill him.

"I'm sorry." Eriol says appearing to be upset.

"For what Eriolkun?"

"For not being there for you."

"It's okay. I'm fine."

"Really?"

"Really?" Sakura says flashing him a smile.

"I'm glad." Eriol says smiling slightly. I can't believe him. I can't believe I'm just standing here while he-."

"What's the matter with you, Yue?" Kerobaros asks wiping cookie crumbs from his face.

"Nothing." I say leaving the kitchen.

"Yue." Eriol says as he sees me. He reminds me so much of Clow. Though I know it is not him I can't help be see the image of the man I considered to be a father before me. But Clow would be more aware of my feelings and not go after the woman I am in love with… Forget that Clow was a strange man at times. I bet he just might. Eriol may not be him, but he has many of his ways so I must not let my guard down.

"Daijoubu, Yue. I want the same thing you do." I'm shocked. Sakura is confused so she just stands there with a perplexed look on her face.

"Sakurachan, don't you think Eriol would like to have some of the cookies you made in the kitchen?"

"Hai." Sakura says leading Eriol away into the kitchen. Tomoyo waited until they were out of hear shot before she spoke.

"Yuesan…"

"What?"

"You and Tsukishirosan are the same person aren't you?"

I say nothing for while then sigh. "Un."

"I can tell by the way you look at Sakura that you love her, but she doesn't know that yet."

"Un."

"Why don't you just tell her how you feel?"

Because I'm afraid she'll reject me how Yukito rejected her before, how I rejected her before.

"It must be hard on you. It is obvious you've been sorting out some things within yourself."

"How?"

"I can tell because at first you and Tsukishirosan seemed so different, but you both seemed to be thinking all time. As Tsukishirosan you would act normally, but as Yue you were always so quiet and sometimes distant. It seemed you had a lot on your mind, but lately you seem less burdened. It's like the line between your false form and true self has been erased. I can tell it's true. You've reconciled the two personalities haven't you?"

"So you don't think I'm a freak?"

"No, everyone has their problems having a split personality just happened to be yours, but your past that now." Tomoyo says smiling.

"Etto, Tomoyochan, Yuesan, could you help me make some more cookies, Kerochan ate them all." Sakura said narrowing her eyes at Kerobaros who was floating beside her.

"What didya expect me to do I was starving."

"Sure thing Sakurachan." Tomoyo said heading for the kitchen.

"I'm helping too." Eriol said already wearing an apron.

"Yuesan," Sakura starts off walking toward me. "I know you don't eat, will you help me still?"

I sigh and give only a nod before walking into the kitchen.

"Let's get this over with." I say as I enter the kitchen.

"Hai." Tomoyo says handing me a bowl of cookie dough. I place the bowl on the counter making sure to wash my hands first.

As I proceed to separate the cookie dough a puff of flour hits me square in the face. I blink angrily and the only thing I can hear is Kerobaros' incisive laughter.

"Haha!" I got you this time. Ohohohoho. You look so funny. Bwahahahaahaha!"

"What happened?" I hear Sakura's voice utter in surprise. "Kero!" She says crossing her eyes.

"Yuesan, are you ok?" Sakura asks holding my hand. I want to melt, but am embarrassed enough.

"I'm fine." I say dryly.

"I'll help you clean up." She says preparing to lead me away.

"I'll take care of it later."

"Don't be silly. You can take a bath here." What! Is she really going to bath me?

"I'm fine."

"Really it's, ok." Sakura says smiling as she prepares to pull me away. I turn and look to see everyone smiling in amusement as they stare at me, except for Kerobaros who has a disgruntled look on his face.

"Grief, I was just trying to have a little fun." Kerobaros whined.

"That was pretty nasty of you Kerobaros." Eriol says before bursting into a fit of laughed. Just as I thought, Eriol is just as twisted as Clow was.

Once we reached the bathroom she had me go in first then closed the door behind her. Wait a minute. I'm in the bathroom with Sakura… and she is going to give me a bath… At that moment a heart-attack comes short of what I experienced at that moment. I was too embarrassed and angry to pay any attention to where she had taken me. I thought she was joking when she said she'd give me a bath. I can't believe she was serious! My head, my heart, I can't believe this is happening!

"Yuesan? Are you ok?" Sakura asks. I had tried to stand there as if nothing was wrong as if the room didn't seem to be spinning around me, but I couldn't help but let out a sigh though it sounded more like a grunt.

"Sakurachan, this really isn't necessary. I can bath myself."

"You said it again." Sakura said with a smile.

"What are you talking about? Why are still here? I said I can take care of this myself, now get out." I say harshly. I can feel my face and entire body growing hot. I love her so much, but I can't bear the fact that she's treating me like a pet. Maybe I was a fool to think that she would fall in love with me or even consider me as an equal. In light of this situation I remember when she said she wanted to be my friend. At that time I only took her words for a kind jester and never truly expected our relationship to be anything more than master and servant, but now I wish I had taken what she said more seriously. Maybe I would have tried harder to show her that I'm a person too. Kerobaros may not mind being treated like a pet, but for me experiencing such treatment for the first time from Sakura it's short of anything except devastating. Now after speaking so harshly toward her and seeing the expression on her face, I wonder if I'm domed to never have my feelings reach her.

"Yuesan…"

"What is it?"

"I'm sorry." Sakura says with a bowed head. "I wasn't thinking. Kerochan doesn't mind it when I give him a bath with the Bubble card, so I didn't think you would either. Kerochan is completely different from you. Though he is more independent than he seems he rather lays around all day unless I ask him to do something. Yuesan, you seem like you're better off doing things on your own. It must have seemed really inconsiderate of me to suggest giving you a bath, like I didn't care how that would make you feel, but I do care about your feelings! That's why I'm sorry, please don't be mad at me." Sakura said starting to cry. I must have been rougher than I thought. Now I feel like a complete idiot for acting and thinking the way I did.

"Stop crying." I say dryly while carefully wiping away the tears that had started to fall down her face. Kerobaros is right I am mean. I did just the opposite of what I wanted to do. I wanted to hug her, tell her I was the one who should be apologizing and then beg her to forgive me. All she was going to do was use the Bubble card on me.

"Don't take it personally. The Bubble card has never been used on me so when you said you would give me a bath, I thought-"

"Oh no, no! I would never do anything like that! I mean it wouldn't be right! Kerochan is kinda like an animal and he doesn't where clothes like you, Yuesan. Not to say I think of you or Kerochan as animals." Sakura blurts out before I could finish. The more she talked the redder her face became and the more embarrassed I became whenever she lifted her eyes attempting to look straight at me.

"Don't worry about it." I say flatly hoping to calm her down. To my surprise it worked.

"Yuesan?"

"Yes?"

"Why is it that Clow never used the Bubble card on you? Kerochan told me Clow always used it on him."

"Did he also tell you that he used it on many other things?" I asked folding my arm and looking at the floor.

"Yes."

"Clow used Bubble to clean the house, do the laundry, and…" I stop remembering the Clow also used Bubble to clean himself. He would strip down right in front of me and Kerobaros and call Bubble to scrub him down from head to toe. That is an image that has been burned into my memory that I'd rather forget and a memory I rather not burden Sakura with.

"Yuesan?"

"…Clow would try to use Bubble on me whenever I needed to be cleaned, but I would never let him. It's better to bath regularly." I say lifting my eyes from the floor. Sakura's face suddenly turns beat red and air became heavy making the situation awkward.

"Gasp, I shouldn't be in here! Gomennasai!" Sakura exclaims giving a quick bow just before running out of the bathroom.

By the time I had finished bathing the cookies were done. Unfortunately my clothes were covered in flour, so I had to "borrow" some of Touya's clothes. It took a minute but I managed to find his Kimono shirt and hamaka; the clothes he wears only for special occasions. Touya can be mad at me later, I needed something I could fit. Kerobaros can prance around naked until the end of time, but I will not be caught dead without any clothing on.

"Welcome back." Eriol says with a queer smile. Then I notice everyone is looking at me strangely.

"Yuesan looks good in kimono, ne." Tomoyo says.

"Hai, hai." Everyone answers simultaneously, except for Kerobaros who gives me a strange look then floats over to me while everyone else goes into the living room.

"Where did you get those clothes from?" He asks.

"None of your business."

"They belong to Sakura's brother don't they?"

"And what's it to you if they do?"

"Ohohoho, he's gonna be mad at you! Oh wish I could see the look on your face when he lets you have it."

"Hmph," I say turning around and going into the livingroom. I came in just in time to see Eriol leaving with Tomoyo. What's going on? While Sakura said good bye I went out the back door to spy… I mean to see what they were up to. They stopped just outside the gate so I moved a little closer to hear what they were saying.

"I'm really glad I got chance to see you again Eriolkun." Tomoyo says cheerfully.

"It has been a while hasn't it. And Sakura, is she really ok?"

"She hasn't said anything to me about it after telling me what happened. Sakurachan didn't cry or anything. All she said was that it made her sad, but that she was ok now. It was the same way with Tsukishirosan. Sakurachan never told me how she was really feeling, but I could tell that her feelings were really hurt. I know she was in love with Tsukishirosan, but that kind of relationship never developed between them so when he told her he didn't feel the same way I imagine it hurt a lot less than with Shyourankun who said he loved her and now says that he doesn't. Poor Sakurachan." Tomoyo said lowering her head.

"Yes, I am worried about her too and though this may be a tragedy, it may also be a window of opportunity."

"Oooh, what are you doing Yue? Spying on the lovebirds?" Kerobaros says floating up behind me. Lovebirds? Hardly. Furthermore I resent the term spying. I rather think of it as reconnaissance.

"I have better things to do." I say in denial.

"Then why are you crouched down here like a spy?"

"I like this spot and I'm trying to rest." I respond lying through my teeth.

"Bad idea, when Sakura's father comes home he'll see you. You must be really tired cuz this is a really dumb spot to take a nap." Kerobaros continues. I wish he'd shut up and go away. I've missed whatever else they had to say.

I feel really low now. So far I've managed to make Sakura cry, steal Touya's clothes, and lie to Kerobaros. He may be more powerful than me but he's also far more gullible... I guess that is too harsh a term. Up until now I've been completely honest with him so he had no reason to think I would lie to him, ever. When he finds out, and I'm almost sure he will, I may never live it down.

"Kerochan, Yuesan, what are you doing outside?" I hear Sakura ask as she emerges from the house.

"Well, I just caught this guy spying." Kerobaros says cockily. So, it would seem I under estimated him and at the same time have learned how terrible of a liar I am. Well, even a fool seems wise if he keeps his mouth shut, so I dared not say a word in denial.

"Kerochan, Yuesan would never do anything like that. It seems to me you were the one that was spying." Sakura says chastisingly. See, it worked, and though I am relieved I wasn't found out, somehow I feel like I caused an angel to cry. Why am I acting like this? If only this were a dream I could wake up and relinquish my guilt, but this isn't a dream, it's more like a living nightmare. What would Sakura think if she knew I actually was spying? What does she think now? I bet she thinks I'm an overly sensitive jerk who needs to be pampered. That's probably why she's more open with Kerobaros than she is or ever will be with me. It's hopeless.

"Awe! Come on, I caught Yue in the act and you accuse me?" Kerobaros pleaded.

"Now I'm sure you did it!" Sakura said with conviction. I can't take this anymore. Before finding out if Kerobaros ever gave up his argument I flew away. This night has been the worst. Everything I did was an utter mistake. I should have never came then maybe I would still have a chance with Sakura, but after how I have behaved..."

"Yuesan!" I hear Sakura's voice call out. She surprised me yet again causing my heart to jump inside my throat. I didn't expect her to be able to find me or rather care to find me. I had found a very thick cloud some ways from her home and was going stay here sulking for a while.

"So, is it true, were you really spying?" Sakura asked. I couldn't bare to look at her and admit my sin so I turned my back.

"Yes." I said with my head lowered.

"And is it true you have feeling for me?"

Okay, that caught me off guard. "Yes." I answer looking over my shoulder.

"Tomoyo, told me. She said you seemed as if you were going to burst, but you couldn't tell me because you didn't know if I felt the same way and was afraid I would reject your feelings. Eriol said the reason you may have been spying is because you were jealous." At this point I spun around. I was going to say that I wasn't jealous, but that would be a lie. I only spied on them because I thought they were going through some kind of matching making plan that did not involve me.

"You must think very lowly of me now." I say unable to look her in the eyes.

"No, that's not what I think of you at all." Sakura says. This surprised me. She doesn't seem angry or appalled. "I think it's... I think it's sweet you were trying so hard and... Yue I feel the same way!"

I can't say a word. I'm utterly shocked with joy. Still it felt unreal. Was she really returning my feelings?

"Yue, I love you!" Sakura cried flying over to me and wrapping her arms around my neck and and waist. It wasn't a dream. She really does love me.

"Everyone is waiting for us, let's go back." Sakura says just before using the Teleport card. In the blink of an eye we're in the sky over her house. Down below I can see Tomoyo waving while holding up her camcorder. Tears were streaming down her face even though she was smiling and obviously very happy. Eriol was there too standing beside her smiling and Touya was there too. Touya... Oh, no he's going to kill me. Even if my dream came true, which it has I was hoping to keep it a secret at least until me and Sakura were married. I came down rapidly with Sakura, my heart pounding.

"It's about time! Maybe now he'll stop being so damn cranky." Kerobaros says.

"I'm so happy for you Sakurachan." Tomoyo says as she continues to record every second.

"This is what I've hoped for all along." Eriol said smiling at me.

Touya said nothing, he just stood there with his eyes closed. Then it hit me. Touya and Kerobaros are in the same space together.

"You knew!" I exclaim shattering the image of a composed Yue I've worked so hard to maintain.

"Hm-hmm. I've knew about him for quite some time even though you all continued to keep it secret from me."

"Oniichan!" Sakura uttered unable to say anything else.

"I don't understand why you felt you had to keep him a secret, especially since I already knew about the cards and you, Yue, but this I didn't see coming at all." Touya says looking directly at Sakura and me. Sakura's arms were still loosely wrapped around me, but she quickly released me.

"Ano..." Sakura started her face turning extremely red.

"Don't worry Sakura it's not you I'm worried about." Touya says walking over to me and firmly puts his hand on my shoulder. "Just because your dating my sister it doesn't mean you can wear my clothes." At that point everyone laughed and even I manage to smile.

~*~*~*~The End~*~*~*~


End file.
